So Its summer here in WHB again. I’m a bit biased on the subject of our summer visitors. See it’s not that they are really all bad, it’s simply that the ones who are, well they’re so bad that they are the only ones you remember. Want some examples? Sure I’d be happy to give you a few. Heck let’s make them bullet points like a top ten list perhaps?why not.
Irritating summer people
Number 10. The Driver. This person only drives for 16 days a year, they are 40 years old and have driven less than a 17-year-old kid, and it shows. Lord help us if they get in the traffic circle. They 5 10-15 miles under the speed limit don’t use any turn signals and have no idea as to what any of the traffic signs mean.
Number 9. The Pet owner. They take there little yappy ankle biting flea ball everywhere it barks, growls and makes a nuisance of itself, just like its owner who constantly says “I can’t leave my child home it has to come with me”. Teach it some manners then just like you would an actual child. Oh wait you don’t have any manners either, my mistake. .
Number 8. The pedestrian, see this one confuses me they live in the city they should be good at this one. Yet they stand in the middle of the road with this dopey look on their faces, maybe their thrown by the lack of taxi’s? I really don’t understand it. Might be because people will stop for them if they are in the cross walk. It’s not only the law, it polite you dumb ass so be polite as well and MOVE.
Number 7. The door jamb. Seriously? Get out of the doorway, it’s not a meeting area and other people need to get through, and when you get knocked into don’t act so damn surprised by it.
Number 6. The Fragrant ones, these are probably my least favorite ones, male and female alike. If you are wearing so much perfume or cologne that i can TASTE it then take your ass back to your place and SHOWER.
Number 5. The parking lot bully. I know you only drive your car for a few hours a year and I’m sure you want it safe but stop parking in a manner that take up 3 places or I am going to hit it anyway and leave a note saying why.
Number 4. The name dropper’s I love these people because you can really mess with them. “I have to cut in line because Famous Mcfamous is coming by later”. Not only do I not care that you know whoever I’m liable to replay with something along the lines of “well I heard he was going to Rogers house because of something you said last week” 9 times out of 10 they wig out and say “who told you that” then defend themselves to me like I ever cared in the first place.
Number 3. The fighters, I love these guys, they fight with each other and say such great things like well you must be from an apt complex because obviously you’re not worth talking to. this goes on for a while with them sniping at each other saying similarly ridiculous things.
Number 2. The Unimportant important people, they usually start with “Do you know who my husband is”? then proceed to tell you at length. usually my response to this is, “oh so you must be his wife Gerty”? then they go nuts cause who the hell is this Gerty woman and who do they think they are wha did they look like… brings a smile to my face.
Number 1. The Loud one, they yell, they scream they carry on and all because.. wait I don’t know why, I stopped listening 10 seconds into it.
What else can you think of, tell some stories.
Real life. From a real mom. Raising real little people.
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